POETS ONLINE
     ARCHIVE - BAD HABITS
We all have them. Or had them. Poet    Billy
     Collins looks back fondly on his
     cigarette habit in "The
          Best Cigarette." 
  Write about a "bad"
     habit you had/have, about trying to lose the habit or about how much
     you enjoy it. Follow the links to read or listen to Collins'
poem(s)
Notation
 
The note scribbled on a scrap of
     paper.
     A job at home, errand, item to buy, person to call.
     Pushed in a pocket, tucked in a slot on the dashboard,
     cornered on the desk blotter, posted to the calendar.
Ignored. Found too late. Laundered.
Good intentions gone bad,
     in handwriting bordering on code
that even I cannot decipher a day later.
The line for a poem that came to me while
     driving,
     written at 55 miles per hour, eyes off the road,
     paper on the airbag desk-
     A line worth dying for?
     Not at all. Opening the paper at ten o'clock that night,
     sitting on the couch with coffee and a sleeping wife,
     the words: "Bad habits. Writing notes."
are another reminder of things undone.
 Charles
Michaels
Love and Lust in the
     American Novel
     
     You're a bad habit of mine.
     Turning the pages of the novel you loaned me
     I cut myself on your book.
     I stopped for a moment
     to watch the blood soak into the page.
     Blood. Fertility. New Life. Death.
     This is what we needed all along.
     Neither of us would bleed
or cut.
 Lianna Wright
     
     
     
THE BATTLE 
i have looked and seen
     what i want
     -but this could never be
     so i have accepted
decided to cope
when i stare into the mirror
these thought no longer matter
convincing myself
     this could never hurt me
     how could i not have seen?
     this is what i want
what i have come to need
i disgust myself
     why should you look upon me?
     i need to control and form
     model this pathetic representation
knowing it can only lead to more hurt, more pain
then i see this all to be meaningless
     for it has become necessary
     
     so once again i take a deep breath
     hold on tight
     shove my finger down my throat
enjoying the pain of self inflicted punishment